Tusk (2014)

Rating: 8.5/10

A podcaster, Wallace, is looking for weird things to podcast about in Canada. When the first story falls through, he finds another man who has interesting stories to tell about Walruses, only to discover that what he really wants is to surgically transform him in to a Walrus.

Okay, this story was started as a joke on Kevin Smith’s own podcast “The SModcast,” that he then told fans to either text #WalrusYes or #WalrusNo as to whether he should make the movie or not. Being that this was his first foray back into film since he had retired due to the failure of Zack and Miri Make a Porno finding an audience while in theaters, or the story was just that good, people voted Yes and so this movie was made. Smith coming back making a body-horror movie is a bit strange considering he’s usually making stoner comedies with his friends, but it’s actually done very well. For one thing, though you can tell most of the major plot points throughout the movie were essentially an inside joke made between Smith and his longtime producer Scott Mosier, the whole thing is played completely straight. It’s a darkly disturbing tale, with a few dark-as-hell jokes thrown in along the way, that at times can be really scary in a way you rarely see here in America (body horror being a much more popular genre in Japan and other places overseas). I admit I’m fairly impressed with the film as a whole.

The acting throughout is excellent. Michael Parks especially does a great job of playing the role of playing the serial killer in this, it might have been a joke originally but you will believe that Parks really is a psychopath who wants nothing more than to transform a man into a walrus. Justin Long also does a really good job playing a jerk in the beginning so no one feels too sorry for him for being tortured and surgically transformed, but does the torture parts so delightfully accurate you’ll end up feeling bad for him anyway.

Oh, one more thing before I move onto scoring, I enjoyed this movie, but it’s really not for everyone. In fact, I don’t know if I could really recommend it to anyone who’s not into body horror like Human Centipede or the like, or just people with the sickest sense of humor perhaps. I’m definitely in the latter category there. But I probably wouldn’t go around recommending this film to most people as it will probably give them a “what-the-heck-did-I-just-watch” vibe and not want to be friends with me anymore…


+7.5: Considering the whole thing is essentially an inside joke, the film is made surprisingly well with a comprehensive story with amazing dialogue like only Kevin Smith can write, for some reason this makes me think Kevin Smith should try to make a Found-Footage Horror film as I feel he could do that really well since it’s a genre most people fail at in my opinion

+1: Amazing acting, especially from Parks

Help me make my own walrus-man!


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